Jill In Brazil: Got any Cheese with that whine?

Jill In Brazil: Got any Cheese with that whine?: "I thoroughly enjoyed my girls night with my friends Jen & Tiana. I also had the kiddies and we went to my favorite pla..."

Got any Cheese with that whine?

I thoroughly enjoyed my girls night with my friends Jen & Tiana.    I also had the kiddies and we went to my favorite place where the kids can play and be watched by someone else.   They had so much fun, they played and we stayed till 11:30.  Listen, this is normal for kids.  Kids do not go to bed early here; I try to get my kids in bed before 10, but it happens almost never.  I have been fighting myself over my old habits here and it is completely a waste of my time. 

I had the opportunity to meet a great person the other day and then have a girls night and it was the medicine that I was looking for.  As, I was sitting with the girls last night I felt compelled to explain why I have a rash on my face…then over the next 2 hours of chatting  I know exactly why I had the rash, because of stress!  In the last month;

·        My parents come and then leave, we had a lot of fun but when they left I really felt like… why are you leaving me?  What am I doing here?   CrAzY, but since then I have really been missing home.

·        The very next day, my dog escapes and I spend 3 days driving day and night around some very difficult neighborhoods which really gave me a head trip.  I was starting to get some answers to the questions about how 2 realities could exist in Brasil. 

·        I was pulled into answering and writing a blog about a subject that really heated me.  “Empower our sisters”, expressing myself takes a lot out of me as it is always a constant fight in Politics.  I do apologize if I did offend anyone, because right or wrong… I know that wasting energy fighting against each other is definitely wrong but this was a subject that I felt so strongly about. 

·        I realized that Rodrigo and I have completely opposite schedules and that we never see each other.  When I am at work he is home and vice versa.  We have never lived like this and it is hard on us but this is what we must do to pay the bills and to save money right now.

·        I realized that I am not 25 anymore.

·        Had to pay my Taxes to the U.S.  Govt.  Thought I’d get a refund but instead had to pay a lot this year, money that I was saving.

·        We also found out that we have to save more $ than we thought for adjusting our status here.  Like 5 times more.   So, had to put a budget together to see where every dollar will go.  SCARRY!!

·        The kids were both sick for 4 days right after each other with fevers of 104.  Gabi kept me up every night as I also found out that she is very dramatic when she is sick…dramatic... but cute.

·        Realized that I don’t know where to take the kids if they get sick and even if I do…can I afford it?  Of course I will, but it throws off my budget.  Never really had to think about this problem. 

·        Washing machine broke.

·        Gabi had bugs in her hair… very common in Brasil but not easy to wrap my brain around.  It has been an impossible and never ending task.

·        Our Energy, water & telephone bill doubled.

·        Got 2 radar speeding tickets in the mail.

·        Rodrigo’s family canceled Bens birthday party the day before and we were really looking forward to spending time with his family.

·        I got sick and then a rash on my face that I have had for 5 days now due to stress and I wake up every day at 5:30am every day to teach with swollen eyes. 

·        I realized that if I do stay here… I need some things… I need $$$$$$, Open spaces, More Support, Health Care, A better schedule with my husband, and a Private School for the kids.  All in good time, but now I can see what I will need to be happy.  There are 2 realities and I want a more secure place in the first one.

 

Ok, I know I am whining but in a foreign country it can get lonely a lot of the time and remember when I said that it was 25 good days and 5 bad???  Well this month so far it has been opposite; 10 good when my parents were here and 21 rough.  Mais ou menos.  As with all of my experiences of course there was growth & lessons learned.  The toughest part is relearning the easy stuff.  What I didn’t mention in all of my whining is that professionally I am doing really well and have met some awesome people.  My perspective can change from one month to another but I have to remember to get out of the house, look at the beauty in all things, and walk with my head up.  Good things are just around the bend… I can feel it.