American Wthdrawl

Truth is when my thoughts travel, all I think about is enjoying myself at the pool in Las Vegas sipping on a Bloody Mary and Shopping for the kids. I am having major American withdrawals right now.   I am sure this is part of my process but right now things are pretty intense.  I am constantly dissecting the effects of living abroad and how the culture is affecting me.  I am asking questions that are untangling webs of old thoughts and then tangling me up in new thoughts and sometimes ones that I am not ready to face.  For instance, the world…I see and understand the global empire that is happening everywhere in the world.  I am not too sure Americans are aware of the rest of the world.  The Multi-National Companies are business as usual in most countries, sometimes I think it was me who was small minded.  This connection to the world doesn’t let me escape.  
I ache at times to go back to my home, full of comfortable things and comfortable ideas of how life should be.  The truth is… we were lucky because a catalog lifestyle doesn’t exist in most other places especially for the majority of people.  You want to think everyone is living the dream because you perceive yourself to be, but it is just not true.   We want to think we are culturally aware because America is a melting pot but we are starting to have little tolerance for foreigners and around the world, people are learning 1-2 other languages to be a part of Global business.  Americans are good people, they are honest, they are innovative & they work hard, they want a better life for their children and they respect one another; this I believe is our greatest gift to humanity and our biggest accomplishment.

I always talk about being united and now I know why… Remember when I said that only in America can we see our differences?  Well, what I know now is that globally all Americans are the same; we are only a country full of American Generalizations.  We see ourselves as individuals but really in comparing culture, we handle crisis the same way, love our families the same way, love our god the same way… what I am saying is that I just fought against Conservatives/Tea Party people for 5 days for entertainment and because I believe in my cause however in a fight or at a friend’s wedding you are my brothers & sisters.  On a grand scale…these little tit for tat things mean absolutely nothing because if America fails or falls we fail or fall together; details and finger pointing aside, no one else is going to care.  Or as my sister always says so comfortably "what ever happens is going to happen and fighting about it isn't going to change anything", I guess I still feel like I can change the world, and this is becoming a heavy burdon.  As individual as each one of us perceives ourselves to be, globally we are one... Americans; like organs in the same body relying on each other to survive.